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Thursday, July 26, 2012

Completely Fried!!!


It's been a couple days since I've had the chance to sit down and collect my thoughts.  I find myself very out of sorts on this particular night.  Its been a few long and busy days.  But, up until today things were still moving along quite well.

It seems today, however,was a day I lost my focus a bit.  I can't really say why....there is no good reason.  I guess I just wasn't thinking from the moment I woke up this morning.  A restless sleep last night may be the start of the problem.  Even my focus now is out of sorts, but I really want to express all my feelings during this journey....... And, be realistic that not every day is going to be a good day. (if only for myself because I really don't even know if anyone is reading my ramblings.... hehe)

I title this blog "completely fried" because it is not only how I am feeling tonight, but the temptation I found myself unable to resist tonight!!  I went to dinner with some friends tonight and I found myself ordering wings with a friend to share.  Even as the words came out of my mouth I knew I was going to regret it in more ways than one.

I wish I could say this is where the bad day began. However, I found myself picking at food I hadn't been eating since I started this journey.   A nibble here, a nibble there today at work. Then tonight eating the wings topped it off with an onion ring or two. 

Eating this stuff has left me feeling "completely fried".  My focus was off all day, my energy level is ka-put!!!  To top it off I just feel sick.....nauseous!!!   I didn't even enjoy it like I have been the good food I have been eating lately!!!

I find it hard to even express all the things I have going on in my head tonight because I am so "completely fried".  So....maybe if I just stop here for tonight I will be able to collect myself for the next time.  Feeling alone on this journey and defeated today with nobody to blame but myself.....

So do I have all the answers??....of course not!!!

So am I ready to give up??......of course not!!!

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